Vans

First day of kindergarten, about two months ago:



Today:



That is all.

The Patch

It's not really Fall until we head out to the pumpkin patch. This year we hit it during the week, so it was a bit quieter than years past, but still a lot of fun for Dutch & Roman (his brother from a different mother).

"We are the pumpkin kings!"

"But we still like a good choo-choo ride!"

The scarecrow contest is my favorite thing each year. The "Krow"dashians! Come on!

Some people take it more seriously than others.

And then others go completely off the rails. This this was welded and wrapped in vines. Awesome & startling.

If I were a crow I would stay the hell away from this thing.

I like a graveyard with a sense of humor.

ONLY FOUR MORE DAYS TILL HALLOWEEN! WEE!

Halloweenie

Gettin' HYPED!

Last Weekend

Oh nothing, just my third 5k. It was our hardest (and slowest) race yet, but Josh still managed to finish first in his age group & I finished third in mine. La la la, just another Saturday.


Oh, you wanna see our plaques? Well ok!

After the race we brushed most of the dirt off & headed out to dinner & a show. If by dinner & a show you mean Water Grill followed by Dudamel at the Phil.

Consider our bouches amused.

Is there anything classier than iPhone-ography at a fancy restaurant? I think not. (This was Josh's tuna. Look at that sear. Seriously, look at it.)

That's my salmon. Do you see that little splash of sunshine on the left? That's a polenta cake with a poached egg on top. I rubbed my entire head in that business.

Then it was on to the serious cultuh. There was a dude sitting next to Josh that was leaning forward & bobbing his head like he was at a Phish concert or something. His date's dress was so tiny it was shocking even by LA standards.

This man was wearing a kilt. Because his silver ponytail wasn't enough to establish his awesomeness in his own mind? He need to seal the deal with a kilt? Way to gild the lily, dude. (Also, a couple of rows ahead another dude was wearing a Chinese silk pajama top with trousers. He was the first to rise for the standing O.) (I love about the first 20 minutes of classical music & then I get a little antsy and start judging the people and outfits around me.) (In case you couldn't tell.)

Fin.

Nope

First loose tooth. Not ready for this nonsense. Not one little bit. Gonna super-glue that fucker in there while Dash is asleep.

Yes, Crazy. No Way Around It.

I can justify a lot of the crazy shit I do, but I have nothing to say in defense of my latest project. It's a dollhouse. A wizard's dollhouse. Where a wizard would live. No one in this (actual) house has any interest in it except for me. Because I am off the deep end.

Here are some (terrible, terrible) pics of my work in progress. There will be more. Yeah there will.

Here's his bedroom. I cut up an old robe I bought in Chinatown, but never really wore, for his bedding. 

 This is his attic room, adjacent to his bedroom. It'll be where he stores his art & unicorn horns & whatnot. (Also, William Morris wallpaper, aged with a damp rag & brown paint).

I found this picture of an insane rug online. I printed it onto iron-on paper & transferred it to muslin. I glued that onto felt (after cutting all the fringe), but I'm thinking I'll need to sew it down to keep it from curling.

This is the big distressed dragon rug I made for the attic.

This is the fossil room. So far, all we have is this triceratops & a skull mounted on the wall. More will come.

This is the Egypt room.

I made the mummy out of pipe cleaners & cheesecloth, and the sarcophagus from an unfinished coffin from Michael's.

 The kitchen is the only room in the house that has a floor so far. It's vinyl made to look like stone.

The kitchen wallpaper is my favorite in the whole house.

The only thing that's done in the living room so far is the fireplace. I'm not 100% sold on it. I may refinish it again.

 This is, so far, my favorite thing in the house. A ship!

Hello, I'm a ship. Awesome.

Oh, another (ghost) ship. Apparently painted by the wizard.

Here are a couple pieces of ephemera I've made up--map & newspaper homage to Harry Potter. Because there's no wizard house without a Harry Potter wink, yes?

I have about 20 of these teensy bottles made up, but this is the one I could find easily to photograph. Powdered unicorn horn, yo.

As any good wizard would, our dude has an extensive stock of wands on hand. (Made by me & Dash out of polymer clay).

The Blair Bitch Project

Dash is on Fall break this week, so when our beloved friends the Stein-Greenes invited us to join them for a little camping, it was, to quote my husband, "on like a popular '80s era platforming arcade game."

Our campsite was called Sheep Creek. How many "up Sheep Creek" jokes do you think I was able to make in the space of two days? One billion. That's how many.

We got to camp in the late afternoon. Just in time to drink some wine and make some dinner (don't you stick your tongue out at me, Fire Face!)

Josh set up the tent right quick without any interference (some may call it assistance) from me.

And Dash & Roman started playing poker. (Kidding, it was Pai Gow.)

Josh & Jordan tried to look hard.

But then the kissing started in earnest.

And went on well into the night.

And here is Dash on his first night sleeping out of doors in the wilderness. Separated from bears & chipmunks & lions (right? lions live in the forest, yes?) and whatnot by only a thin sheet of nylon and his mother's terrifying snores.

In the morning we breakfasted on Nutella & bananas on whole wheat & French press coffee. Because we were camping, but we're not wild animals, yo.

Then it was time for fishing. Here are the boys' matching Transformers rods. Because obviously such a thing would exist.

Liz: Honey, make a fisherman face.

Josh: How's this?

Liz: Um. Sure.

Fucking cuties, Jiminy Christmas.

More cuties.

And then it was time to get down to fishing! Look at that casting technique!

Also!

Beauty shot.

That's my sad claw hand trying to figure out how to hold a rod. I gave up after a while & spent the rest of the afternoon trudging around the forest, drinking box wine from a plastic tumbler & collecting acorn caps. 

You know, like you do.

At one point I looked up & saw this.

And then I said a silent prayer of gratitude that Michele Bachmann wasn't around in 1909, because I'm pretty sure this would all be a Wal-Mart by now if she had.

We didn't catch any fish, but I think Dash may have enjoyed himself anyway.

And then it was back to camp for more tender times between Jordan & Josh.

And ghost stories around the fire.

[not pictured: me almost getting into a fist-fight with a fellow camper about his disinclination to control his dogs. I may be having some anger issues that I'll need to address sooner rather than later]

Anyway, it was an amazing, beautiful trip & we're so, so grateful that the Stein-Greenes invited us to join them. Thank you, wonderful friends.

Also! Killed three items off my  Life List:

• Camping
• Fishing--hey, I said 'go fishing,' I didn't say 'catch a fish'
• Cure Fear of Heights--this one is a toughie. I'm definitely not cured, but the ride up & back was pretty hairy & I didn't freak. I think I'm finally at the place where I won't allow my phobia to prevent me from doing and seeing amazing things. So I'm calling it.