Knitter with Attitude

This knitting thing is the jam. We recently went to visit Dash's Grandma Sonja, Uncle Doron & Aunt Cheryl in Santa Rosa/Sebastopol, and I wanted to make gifts to thanks for them for putting up with our lazy, unhelpful asses for three days.

Grandma moved to wine country, so when I found this pattern for a wrap called Grapevine, I knew it was kismet.

Pattern here.

For Aunt Cheryl I wanted something  more clean and modern to match her aesthetic.

I added the tassels and evil eye beads because there isn't a lily I won't gild.

  

Age of Brass and Steam pattern  here.

Uncle Doron is a die hard Giants fan, so Josh came up with the idea to knit him a hat in Giants colors. He even helped me pick out the perfect shade of orange, which was a pretty selfless act of love, considering how deeply Josh hates the Giants.

Action shot! (I had to call Josh to get permission to buy Dash that hat).

Also! I knitted this fox who is very cute but Jiminy Christmas, knitting dolls is a giant pain in the ass. He was supposed to be a gift but Dash took immediate possession.

Pianist

Baby's first piano recital. I have never felt more like an actual adult parent then when we put him in piano lessons.

Talented, 2015

(Grand)Mother's Day

I forgot to take pictures of all my wonderful Mother's Day gifts and celebrations (I suck). But here's what little Dutch made for his Grandmas this year:

We made this sweet jewelry dish from oven bake clay & an embossing sheet. We used white clay then he painted it once it was baked & cooled.

Gotta sign your work.

We covered a tin can in more oven bake clay. Once it was baked & cooled, he painted it to look like a pineapple!

Then we added this cute succulent that kinda evokes the top of a pineapple? Maybe?

 Aaaaaaand, because of course I did, I took the opportunity to make myself a super-nipply boobie planter.

You're welcome.

Astros

Oh, hey! Baseball! Baseball baseball baseball. Also, baseball. Here. This is Dash playing baseball. If you ever see him in person, you'll be able to easily recognize him because he'll be playing baseball. In conclusion: baseball.

Los Angels

 

 First game of the season. We lost. Waa waa.

Just Foolin' Around

April Fool's is one of my very favorites. I get to fuck with the kid and not feel bad. This year he was onto our first prank instantly, so next year we're gonna bring the pain. There will be permanent hair dye involved.

This letter was waiting for him when he came down this morning. He knew right away that his principal's signature was forged and that the date was wrong (That was my screw-up, didn't see it until Josh pointed it out, and even then I couldn't imagine Dash would notice. I was wrong. Kid could literally lose his pants off his body and have no idea, but one flipping number is off on a letter and he's Hercule-fucking-Poirot allasudden).

 This was Josh's idea. We mixed Skittles, M & M's & Reese's Pieces together in a Skittles box and re-sealed it with double stick tape.

 Our desperate hope is that he just shoves a big handful into his maw at lunch. We'll see what he reports back after school.

 

 He hasn't seen this one yet, either.

I was super-excited for this to make him (literally?) shit himself after school, until Josh reminded me that my mother would be bringing him home after piano today. So if she uses the bathroom before he does, things could escalate quickly. Still not warning her about it, though.